Everybody has a very specific moment in life when they have that realization that changes one’s entire perspective of life. But the epiphany that something is different, can only be understood when we are cognizant of the norm. This is because the country I was born and raised follows a very specific way of living, rooted in tradition and, still, very authoritarian today. A society where the fundamental attribution errors are minimized due to its tendency to respect others: a basic principle that can be traced back to the fundamental idea of Confucius.

I remember during primary school’s TPA meetings – though I had no knowledge at the time – people’s treatment toward my parent was different: my friend’s parents were overly kind and polite to them. It was at a later stage in my life I realized what was happening, and it all came to be very sudden and I had to through a prolonged period of time in order to assimilate such information. It wasn’t easy at first, when I realized that my parents were considerably older than other parents, I started to think about the inevitable; it is a common understanding that anything that begins early finishes early. My parents have always supported me in any of the decisions that I made: mentally and economically, I don’t remember having any difficulty in achieving the desired goals. I sometimes think, maybe too much, but never did I take it for granted. I remember reading from my biology textbook something about the personality, and it could be reflected on birth order. I remember that an only child would have certain traits I could identify with.

This abrupt change of awareness came with a change of behavior. The life of a high schooler was not that different. The same life on a loop where the only escape from the daily life is the little social life we are able to nourish during the early afternoon time. Make my way to the dorm after classes. Opened the door and my roommate not having arrived yet. The room was always the way we had left it in the morning. A routine that struck me as very uncomfortably familiar – I remember seeing these untouched and unaltered rooms from day to afternoon while I doing my volunteer service at the Raphayel Facility for the Disabled Children in Korea. While I was helping the physically disabled people from morning to late afternoon, I would notice they would leave their rooms in the morning and come back to the room that had not been altered. I wasn’t pity I remember feeling but was grateful that when I am back home during the holidays, I would come back to a house that would sometimes smell like dinner or just a feel of human presence – I am truly thankful to my parents, but at the same time it was one of the toughest lessons I had learned. How hard it is to even to go about an everyday routine is something does not go right. I cannot claim that at the time I was fully aware of the world around me but as a young teenager I stated to make up my mind about where to aim my attention and academic endeavors.

The fact that I had to be able to survive society by myself was both haunting and my biggest motivation. During my high school years, I realized that social life was important, but as I saw my academic endeavors deteriorating, I decided to take action – maybe too late. I never gave up on the idea that I could make the change and that I would be able to produce and achieve. Over turning grades and was purely motivated by not only the intrinsic satisfaction, but also the inner fear that I might one day be left alone in the world. My parents were surprised and proud I mentioned this ongoing fear I had. I had never told them the reason behind such fear, a fear that has shaped my thoughts and my core motivation to pursue a career in medicine. I realized about the inevitable, and help me see the world in a completely different perspective. I knew then that my parents would not be able to stay with me forever – maybe shorter than other student’s parents. I also knew that there will be a point when I would have to stand society by myself. I am sure that my parents will aid me in my achieving such goals, but there are certain thing I have to face on my own. This fear that still persists today has no scapegoat to blame. Just as communities follow the norms of the societies they belong, we follow the natural path of life.